Welcome to Jester's Trek.
I'm your host, Jester. I've been an EVE Online player for about six years. One of my four mains is Ripard Teg, pictured at left. Sadly, I've succumbed to "bittervet" disease, but I'm wandering the New Eden landscape (and from time to time, the MMO landscape) in search of a cure.
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Saturday, September 10, 2011

Kill of the Week: Insane people

Just for fun, I'm gonna go with this:
http://www.fatal-ascension.com/killboard/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=41067

It's less about the fit -- although the fit is hysterically bad -- and more about the pilot, Stokar, who is justifiably famous in New Eden for being both insane and an enormous tool.  It goes to prove that some 2004 players aren't elite PvPers.  Some of them have, in the immortal words of Kaylee Frye, looked into the enormous black of space and "went all higgledy."

In the Firefly universe, the insane people are Reavers.  They are the scariest people in space, murdering, raping, and eating all who they find in their path.  Hopefully in that order, natch.

Still, a few things about this ship jump out at me as things people might think are a good idea, even if they are not insane, so let's cover them real quick:
  1. Mixing short- and long-range weapons is always, always a bad idea.  If you are doing this, your fit is bad and you are a bad person.
  2. Note well that this is a Raven Navy Issue.  This ship is neither CPU-constrained nor power grid-constrained.  As a result, both the Co-Processor and Reactor Control System are completely unnecessary.  You should try to avoid "fitting modules" whenever you can, but if you do fit the things, please make sure that they're even close to necessary.
  3. If you have an empty slot on your ship when you undock, it had better be because you are warping that ship directly to the sun so that you can try to fly into it.
  4. Look up the Powergrid Subrotuine Maximizer when you have a spare moment in-game.  Contemplate why you would ever want to fit this rig on any ship... ever.  Contemplate why you would ever buy, much less fit, a Tech2 version of this rig.  Oh, that's right: you'd do it because you were insane.
In the Firefly universe, insane people are scary.  In the EVE Online universe, insane people are tools.

EDIT (13/Sep/2011): Small misstatement in this blog entry.  Empty high slots are acceptable.  Any other empty slot is not.  If nothing else, fit nano and a Cap Recharger.

11 comments:

  1. Firefly is definitely one of the better sci-fi series out there, is a shame it was axed after 1 season. They recently replayed the whole series (and maybe the movie) on the Discovery's Science channel, which was pretty bad ass.

    As for the meat of the post, points 1-2 are excellent and made me giggle.

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  2. "Ordinarily he was insane, but he had lucid moments when he was merely stupid."
    Heinrich Heine

    I was originally searching for:
    "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
    Albert Einstein

    but found so many good ones: http://www.quotationspage.com/subjects/stupidity/

    Keep up it up Jester

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  3. Don't forget mixing buffer and active tank.

    Tech 1 and Named mods on a faction ship.

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  4. Beautifully and hilariously put. That rig is really the icing on the cake.

    Sanity! It's over-rated.

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  5. Same dude, same insanity: http://eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=10157760

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  6. Confirmation that the pilot is insane:

    http://www.fatal-ascension.com/killboard/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=28857

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  7. i heard some alliances have 20 page threads just about Stokar

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  8. Plus points for explaining why the fit is bad - too many people just say 'fail fit!' and leave new players (which still exist) wondering as to why.

    I do have seen a somewhat sensible combination of long- and short-range weapons once, though: on a WH-soloing Apoc, the pilot had mounted a medium T2 Laser next to his Mega Beams, to deal with the drone-eating sleeper frigates.

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  9. http://www.rotekapelle.com/killboard/?a=pilot_detail&plt_id=7099&view=losses

    Enjoy.

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  10. @Druur: I'm not that familiar with WH space any more, but wouldn't Mega Pulses be superior to Mega Beams for dealing with larger sleeper ships?

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  11. Sorry to necro a month-old blog post, but I felt that I had to put this on the record, as I came up with a corrected version of his fitting (feel free to change the ammo or upgrade parts, this is just a baseline):

    [Raven Navy Issue, what Stokar should have been flying]

    Prototype Cloaking Device I
    Cruise Missile Launcher II, Wrath Fury Cruise Missile
    Cruise Missile Launcher II, Wrath Fury Cruise Missile
    Cruise Missile Launcher II, Wrath Fury Cruise Missile
    Cruise Missile Launcher II, Wrath Fury Cruise Missile
    Cruise Missile Launcher II, Wrath Fury Cruise Missile
    Cruise Missile Launcher II, Wrath Fury Cruise Missile
    Small Tractor Beam I

    Domination X-Large Shield Booster
    Stasis Webifier II
    Invulnerability Field II
    Invulnerability Field II
    Photon Scattering Field II
    Heavy Capacitor Booster II, Cap Booster 800

    Damage Control II
    Ballistic Control System II
    Ballistic Control System II
    Ballistic Control System II
    Ballistic Control System II

    Large Core Defence Capacitor Safeguard II
    Large Core Defence Operational Solidifier I
    Large Core Defence Capacitor Safeguard I


    Hobgoblin II x5
    Hammerhead II x5
    Hornet EC-300 x5


    And yes, Stokar IS insane. Even if he had all V in the skills that mattered, he'd still DIAF in his failfit Navy Raven 1v1 against one of my armor 'Canes in a matter of a couple of minutes, and I'm only oh, about a 15mil SP pilot. (Who needs Falcon alts when your enemy giftwraps your victory?)

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