Welcome to Jester's Trek.
I'm your host, Jester. I've been an EVE Online player for about six years. One of my four mains is Ripard Teg, pictured at left. Sadly, I've succumbed to "bittervet" disease, but I'm wandering the New Eden landscape (and from time to time, the MMO landscape) in search of a cure.
You can follow along, if you want...

Monday, November 7, 2011

Quote of the Week: Infliction of misery

This week's QOTW comes from a somewhat unusual source:
The only way you could get a more immediate and satisfying capability to hurt your opponents in meaningful ways would be if they voluntarily wired electrodes to their scrotums and let you deliver repeated shocks to their testes.
The source?  It comes from a new recruitment drive for... wait for it... never mind, you've already guessed it... Goonswarm.

Now granted, GSF is down from its peak of more than 7000 members to a mere 6200 members, so maybe they need more cannon fodder.  And (unusually for me) I don't really have all that much to say about this recruitment drive.  But the interesting thing to me about this blog post is the emphasis, and that emphasis deserves to be highlighted.

We're now about a month into the run-up to Crucible, and learning about all the new and updated toys that are going to be part of it.  With one or two notable exceptions, even EVE bitter vets are delirious with joy over all that's being done to the game this winter, and the promises being made for the new year.  Over on Failheap and Kugu, players that have been unsubbed for most of 2011 are grudgingly admitting that they'll be resubbing for 2012, if they haven't done so already.  All of them point to CCP's new direction as the cause.

And yet this recruitment drive has almost nothing to say about that.  There's only a single paragraph that even mentions the winter expansion, and some of what's said in that paragraph is either unproven or dead wrong.  The drive, in short, is not aimed at prior EVE players at all.  From start to finish, this post has two aims:
  • introduce people who have no idea what EVE is about to EVE; and,
  • sell them on all the glorious heart-break they can inflict on other EVE players.

If I were to pick one key phrase to represent this post, it would come out of the very first paragraph: "infliction of misery".  And sure, that's what the Goons are about(1).  It's just interesting to me to base a whole recruiting strategy on something so negative, when the winter expansion itself is so positive.  ;-)

(1) Before you ask, yes, I checked the Goonswarm Shrugged numbers over the weekend, and no, they're not slacking.  All of the conclusions from my last post on that subject still stand.


  1. Keep in mind the recruitment post is designed to recruit other somethingawful.com goons who aren't currently playing Eve. It's not meant to be a sales pitch to the general public.

    Despite all the positive things coming in the winter expansion Eve is(and will continue to be) a bad game that can only be tolerated by playing with other goons and that is why the recruitment post plays up the "goonier" aspects of gameplay.

  2. "Infliction of misery" is one of the positive gameplay aspects of EVE Online.

  3. Goons will be goons

  4. Infliction of misery is probably the primary reason I joined EVE.

    Whether misery be to myself or upon others is apparently irrelevant, but hey. Can't have everything in life.

  5. The SomethingAwful recruitment post, as smg says, is aimed at goons. Down through the years, I and others have taken a bunch of approaches, so I had to come up with something fresh that would grab people.

    This was the result, and I genuinely believe that Eve's historically unflinching attitude towards the consequences of actions and of carelessness is what, in the monoculture of MMO Skinner boxes and levelling simulators, makes it uniquely promising. And, come to that, just plain better.

  6. P.S. You are quite right that we were down 800 members, but that was because we booted them for selling supercaps to neutrals. Fortunately we've got about 400 new forum accounts (c.100 are still in empire working out how to apply to a corp) already from that recruitment drive post, which is something not many people can say!

    CCP should pay me a stipend :D


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