Welcome to Jester's Trek.
I'm your host, Jester. I've been an EVE Online player for about six years. One of my four mains is Ripard Teg, pictured at left. Sadly, I've succumbed to "bittervet" disease, but I'm wandering the New Eden landscape (and from time to time, the MMO landscape) in search of a cure.
You can follow along, if you want...

Monday, August 27, 2012

Quote of the Week: Births and death

It was a pretty quiet week in EVE last week, so I'm going to go with a trio of off-beat announcements.  Two are announcing births.  The other, a death.

As I've mentioned before, my favorite of all the Star Treks is Deep Space Nine, for a variety of reasons.  But a big one was the on-going character development that happened over the course of the series.  The series regulars changed and grew as people and as they did, their personalities, situations, and lives developed.  You know, kinda like real people.  Unlike the other Treks where the characters were flies in amber, forever trapped in a single moment in time, DS9 allowed its characters some story arcs.

Still, as the series went on, it did have one constant running gag and that was the annual "torture O'Brien" episode.  The purpose of this annual event was to put one of the series regulars, Chief Miles O'Brien, into some horrible situation and make him deal with it.

I'm starting to think that Mord Fiddle over at Fiddler's Edge is bringing back this tradition with an annual "torture Mittens" post.  Now granted, Mord's been pretty fixated on Mittens and on the Goons for quite a while, since the start of the "foreverwar".  Still, last year's torture Mittens post was a classic, probably the single best EVE blog post that was written last year.(1)  Which makes this year's version all the more amusing.  Here's the opening shot (which I've altered slightly for reasons which I expect will be obvious):
The Mittani is dead.

Which is not to say that he's dead, dead.  I mean [Mittens], some-time lawyer and full-time bacon aficionado is, to the best of my knowledge, still among the quick.  He is likely in Wisconsin, happily  deep-frying cheese curds as I write this.  But, while his in-game alter-ego persists in the digital sense, Mittens is no more.
Go read it, because it's damned amusing and very much worth your time.

The first birth announcement is, of course, the linking of DUST 514 to Singularity, EVE's official test server:
Today on August 27, 2012, we have reached another milestone with opening DUST 514 on our test server Singularity for EVE players.

DUST 514 was moved to Singularity earlier last week and available there for DUST players.
Don't have much to say about this one except that of course DUST 514 mercenaries continue to not be spaceship-shaped.  The repeat of :18months: development on micro-transaction space pants, minus the accompanying space-rage, appears to be moving right along.  Don't worry though.  For the second birth announcement, EVE is getting logistics frigates.  'cause if there's anything EVE's roaming T1 frig gangs were crying out for, it was an unarmed ship specifically designed to keep them from dying...

Like I said, pretty quiet week.  ;-)

(1) Yes, I was jealous.


  1. Seeing DUST really makes me think the CCP devs went 'well we can't sell this micro-transaction shit to Eve players, they're too smart. Who else can we sell it to? Oh yeah, retarded COD players who're happy to pay 20 bucks every other week for a new map'. It's obvious who's market they want to encroach on...

  2. Mord's obsessive behavior is hilarious. The goons are torturing him by sheer virtue of not noticing him (or, if they do, seemingly not caring).

    1. While I thank the many Goons who bring hits to my website and intel to my in-box, I do not generally write about them beyond the fact that they are in thrall to TheMittani®.

      I write for my own pleasure and do not worry overmuch about canned opinions from TheMittani® forum drones.

  3. Been on Sisi today. Having Dusters on effs up local as ALL of us, the 2 EVE pilots and the 100+ Dusters were ALL in local and NO WAY to tell em apart... weird.

    1. hmmmm...i think that would be worth it to buy a playstation just so i could eff up local in my area. i'd name my new dust bunnies to match my eve characters and VOILA! no end of headaches for local pirates. muahahahah



    2. The implications of this are enormous, and it's got a huge target painted on it for being one of those things players will rage about and CCP will ignore.

      Does anyone really think CCP will provide an option for EVE players to turn off the appearance and chat of Dusties in local? LULZ is right!

    3. @Anon1441:
      a) CCP will *have* to provide a way to filter.
      b) CCP will be *extremely* resistant to doing so.

  4. Yes, i mean god forbid CCP allowed suicide t1 frig roams to work as intended!

  5. I'm still trying to wrap my head around this concept that ccp knows the game so well that "support" roles that are uniform for every ship class might complement their other 'roles'

    now, what did they say again? *rummages thru mindnumbingly clueless dev blogs*
    Combat ships
    Attack vessels
    Bombardment ships
    Support vessels
    Industrial ships
    please ... kill... me

    All that coding time while corporations are still in beta-level software mode, along with stuff like "gee, why can't i order my inventory according to slot type?"

  6. DS9 was a B5 ripoff :colbert:

    1. I think you meant to say DS9 was a better version of B5 :condi:

    2. Seeing as DS9 started a year before B5 that's a bit of a stretch.

    3. Crash Raindog:

      Furthermore, although what you said is true for their first full seasons, the pilots first aired weeks apart, and B5 was actually announced before DS9.

  7. T1 logi frigates... lol. As if the current T1 logi cruisers see so much use in the game, we now need T1 logi frigates.

    Well, I suppose we did need some new pinatas for dessies to insta-pop.

    The thread is even more laughable. Most of these morons obviously have never flown a logi.


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