Welcome to Jester's Trek.
I'm your host, Jester. I've been an EVE Online player for about six years. One of my four mains is Ripard Teg, pictured at left. Sadly, I've succumbed to "bittervet" disease, but I'm wandering the New Eden landscape (and from time to time, the MMO landscape) in search of a cure.
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Monday, April 8, 2013

Kill of the Week: Loot pinata

I don't usually feature dumb people for the Kill of the Week, but sometimes you have to recognize a special breed of dumb.  I present you the best possible ship to use to bash a tower:

I knew wormhole guys were rich.  But damn.  That fifth Caldari Ballistic Control System was adding 15 DPS to this fit assuming perfect skills.  Story on this one is pretty straight-forward.  Scout spots small fleet of BCs and BSs shooting at an off-line tower.  Fine, we've all done it from time to time.  But this guy apparently warped his five ECM Raven Navy Issue to the tower, started shooting, then wandered off to have a cigarette.  When he returned to the computer, he was in Jita.  Here's his pod.

I invite you to count the mistakes.  If you can't get to at least eight, you're not trying hard enough.  ;-)  Thanks to a reader in Surely You're Joking for pointing me at this one!  I've said it lots of times on this blog: the right tool for the right job.  Yeah, this RNI does 1500 DPS or so.  But a total glass cannon Oracle does 1200 DPS at 10% of the price and it doesn't burn through ammunition...

Honorable mention, you say?  Sure.  I'm a big fan of this Bestower, and this Bestower.  Yes, they're separate kills.  Yes, I know I get yelled at when I mention haulers, but these are special.  These two characters were created within 20 minutes of each other.  Then they died in these ships within 20 minutes of each other in the same system, to the same pilot.  I'd say RMT money laundering is alive and well in EVE Online, wouldn't you?

Number of dead super-caps last week: 2

First super kill of the week gives this week's post its name: this Wyvern.  It's a pretty straight-forward ratting Wyvern caught and killed by Verge of Collapse.  It doesn't seem to have made the EVE news websites.  But I doubt the story was much more complicated than "Oh, it's just one neut in local and the intel channels are clear.  What can he do about me-- oh shit, where did all these people come from?!"  What's funny about the kill isn't how it happened.  It's what was in this Wyvern's cargo hold.  Was there any item in EVE this Wyvern wasn't carrying?  I have this picture of a Beverly Hillbillies Wyvern pick-up truck with all this dude's worldly possessions making a big pile in the back with his grandma perched in a rocking chair on top.

And yesterday, there was this TEST Alliance ratting Nyx killed by Shadow Cartel.  Killed in Auner... in low-sec... in his very first day in TEST Alliance.  That's five Nyx jumps from TEST's ratting space.  Apparently, he decided a good way to celebrate his very first day in TEST Alliance was to run Level 5 missions in low-sec.  I swear I am not making this up.  This appears to be the real story of how this Nyx died.  TEST has recruited quite a good pilot here, don't you agree?  We can even make a pretty accurate prediction of what he's training: Advanced Drone Interfacing V.  Four drone control units?  Scrub.

This isn't technically a super, but I also enjoyed this Vherokior Probe kill for a variety of reasons.  Drone regions completely safe, amirite?  It was almost a super-cap kill of the week...  Maybe the pilot will finish fitting out that titan he's working on and then I'll be able to write about him again.


  1. actually jester, the nyx has a very very dumb reason why it died, shadow cartel was laughing their ass off. Hopefully TMC will have the story covered tomorrow

  2. Can someone explain why an RMTer needs to move lots of valuable in-game items around in-game?

    1. Money laundering. An RMTer will want to hide which account is selling ISK, so you can't just trade assets to them or send them a big pile of ISK. So one alternate option is to drop assets in deep space somewhere then have the RMT alt pick them up. But I guess CCP has gotten wise to that one.

      Another way is to send the assets out into deep space, blow them up with another alt, and then pick up what's left. You lose 50% of the assets this way, but it's apparently harder for CCP to track (since it's mixed in with all of the other ship explosions that day).

      This is all speculation. CCP won't share their bot/RMT hunting methods.

  3. Would you be good enough to tell us noobs what the eight mistakes are. I am very curious. It will help me with my RNI. Thank you.

  4. Dinsdale PirannhaApril 9, 2013 at 10:28 AM

    On a completely unrelated note, on Twitch TV goon soundwave just announced he is about to have ice become a conflict driver, and it should be the "oil of Eve". Translation: ice mining will be removed from high sec, prices will skyrocket as it will be controlled by null sec cartels.

    Oh, and prices started spiking 3 days ago, but I am sure goon soundwave never gave inside info to his cartel trading buddies.

  5. I can't stop laughing, yeah it was a shit fit, something I threw together a couple of months back with the spares I had lying around, purely for POS bashing, but what the hell, it's only isk right :')

    5 multi ecm's on a CNR, I can hear the laughter now, but I'll say this, the 2 logi's I jammed out 3 weeks ago while undertaking another POS bash wouldn't be so patronizing! To quote yourself "the right tool for the right job." It works, trust me, or not, whatever.

    As you stated, living in W-Space is extremely profitable. I make a shit tonne of isk operating in various WH's, so much so that I do get lazy and a little blase when I should be trying to retain that hard earnt isk, but no, at the end of the day I've lost countless ships in W-Space, and K-Space for that matter, when choosing to go afk for various reasons. My 2yr old daughter couldn't find mum the other day, came up to me with a runny nose, I went afk, cleaned her up and came back to my pod lol. Shit happens, what do you do? Did this latest 3b loss effect me in any way shape or form, not in the slightest, other than the time I wasted running the damn CNR the 30+jumps round trip to get it there lol :')

    Everything you stated is correct, obvious, but indeed correct. Yes, I could and should cross train into a laser light show, but meh, they're not for me. I mean who the hell wants to pilot a piss ant 1200dps BS when they could be piloting a 1600-1800dps CNR/Vindi??? Don't focus on the investment that it takes to get those BS's up and running correctly, if that's how pilots were playing Eve these days we'd all be in T1 frigs and saving our isk for a rainy day, wtf??? Bring the dps m8, don't be afraid, just bring it lol.
    You win some, you lose some, it's just a game lol, a game that I've enjoyed for years admittedly, but it's just a game none the less.

    I obviously care less about the cost of ammunition blah blah blah, installing blingy mods for an extra 15dps, and care more about what I do with my time in game. Undertaking a mundane task like destroying on offlined faction tower for example does in fact give me a certain level of satisfaction(read entertainment), and kudos if I get highest damage, and lest not forget the payday when you cash in on all those faction guns/batteries etc. So this time it didn't work out, I took a loss, whatever, I replaced the CNR and clone the same day.

    Food for thought, we pilots in Eve grind away at our various ways of making isk, running missions, sleeper sites, mining roids or keeping a sharp eye on the markets looking for that next market play etc etc etc., yeah, but what's the end game? What are you doing with all the isk that you're earning? Saving up for your next ship, a deadspace module, a rainy day??? And then what, when you have all that you desire from the game in the form of hardware then what???

    I make it, I spend it, and if I need more than I have on hand I plex, and in return I get to enjoy the game that is Eve, my way, nobody else's way but my way, and if that makes my blase attitude and subsequent loss of ship news worthy, then so be it, but do me a favor, before you attempt to humiliate someone else due to a poor fit blah blah blah ask yourself this question; "do they really give a shit?" "is this really news worthy?"

    Prior to my friend from Surely You're Joking throwing me your link, I'd never heard of you or your Blog lol, but you know what, stick with it, as I'm confident your not always a complete dick when it comes to reporting events that happen within Eve.


    1. Next time you should bring a dread. More damage, more spendy, more fun (for all parties involved).

    2. U really mad bro

    3. TL;DR version: I'm mad.

      & dumb.

      Jester, that guy you say you'd never heard of is pretty well-known in EVE, even before that CSM8 election thing you may have heard about (or may not have, considering your apparent intelligence level).

      & you know, all things considered, I'd rather be known as a dick than as a moron. Grats for being Retard AND Failfit Kill of the Week.


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